Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
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