A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
