I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I think I sprained my soul last night
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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