I heard we made out
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
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