The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize