If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
