officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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