Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
