he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
