You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
