Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
