the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
