Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
