I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
