i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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