No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
