if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
