Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
