So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
