so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
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