good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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