Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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