But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Randomize
