addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
