I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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