I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
