I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
