So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
