Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
