This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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