I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
