At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
