just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I want her autograph on my taint
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
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