I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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