a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
