Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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