I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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