My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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