does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
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