were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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