I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize