I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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