i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize
