You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
