if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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