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My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
