Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
