Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
