Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize
