they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
